A Week of Remembering
It has been a week of remembering. Yesterday Americans took a collective pause to remember where we were and how we learned of the attack on the Twin Towers in New York. Eleven years have passed and yet most of us can remember that day like it was yesterday. Not just the time and place, but the visceral feelings we had – that is part of the enduring impact of trauma. We can all answer the words of Alan Jackson, “Where were you when the world stopped turning, that September day?”
Here in Central Texas, it has also been a week of remembering the devastating fires of Labor Day 2011 that burned over 32,000 acres of pine forest and hill country landscape, destroyed hundreds of homes and ravaged many lives. The recovery is not yet over.
Though the community and national losses of these events are staggering at every level, the tragedies were not what stood out as I listened to the broadcasts and reflections that marked their anniversaries. Rather, everyone interviewed described the heroism, sacrifice and humanity witnessed when people are brought together by Something Bigger.
From firefighters and first responders who risked – and gave – their lives to save others; to churches who joined forces despite differing traditions; politicians who worked together across party lines, and people of different color, backgrounds and cultures who held hands in prayer and grief – amazing things happen when we focus on Something Bigger than our differences.
For a period of time, we focused on what brings us together instead of what separates us. I remember how good that felt; maybe you can too. My family made a point to say “I love you;” my neighbors waved at each other more often; my community was more patient and giving to each other; and my nation came together in a way I hadn’t experienced in my lifetime.
In the midst of deep tragedy, we experienced a glimpse of what is possible; what we are capable of as humans. So I have to ask myself, “Is this only possible when it is instinctually triggered by crisis, or is it also possible to choose to focus on Something Bigger?”
I believe it is. I know that it is possible on an individual level, because it’s part of what I teach as a therapist. Conscious choice in one’s focus facilitates transformation in any relationship; in friendships, marriages and families. What we focus our attention (energy) on, is intensified in our experience.
If it’s possible on a family level, why not within our national family, or our global family? What a grand experiment that would be. While I can’t guarantee the outcome, I do know that amazing things happen when we focus on Something Bigger than our differences.
With deep gratitude and honor of all who have given us this lesson.