Stress: The Kiss of Death or the Spice of Life
5 Keys of Stress Management
April has been designated as “Stress Management” month. Perhaps its the pressure and frenzy of completing our taxes that makes it foremost in our minds, but the truth is that we need stress management skills all year long.
Our experience of stress filters into our daily experience, conversations and relationships; and impacts our mental clarity, productivity and physical health.
THE SPICE OF LIFE
Sometimes I feel like stress gets a bad wrap; as if all stress is negative and should be avoided at all cost. But we know that stress is a part of living and that our minds and bodies are wired to adapt to it. In fact, moderate, time-limited stress is the spice of life.
Stress can sharpen our minds, enhance our senses, and energize us for the task ahead. Once stress is perceived the body responds by releasing stress hormones including cortisol, norepinephrine and adrenaline. It shuts down digestion and redirects energy to the areas needed for “fight or flight.” It prepares us for that big presentation, first impression or important conversation.
In this kind of stress our body responds, the event passes and our system returns to normal. Homeostasis is restored until the next stressful event.
THE KISS OF DEATH
Unfortunately, most of the stress experienced in our culture does not consist of an occasional stressful event that resolves itself but stress that is chronic in nature.
Sometimes its a series of acute stressors that begin to run together. We’ve all had those stretches when you start to think “what next?” Problems begin when there is not enough time for the body to regain homeostasis between events.
Other stressors are chronic in nature; things that are ongoing or not likely to change in the near future. Continual deadlines, information overload, traffic hassles, money problems or difficult relationships to name a few.
When stress becomes chronic, demands are placed on the body that it was not designed to handle. The adrenal glands can become fatigued by the constant demand for stress hormones. High cortisol levels contribute to cellular inflammation, which is now recognized as the underlying cause of most degenerative diseases (high blood pressure, heart disease, cancer, etc.) Chronic stress is also a factor in mood imbalances, depression and anxiety.
WHAT TO DO?
It’s pretty clear that chronic stress is detriment to mental, emotional and physical health, so “stress management” is a goal of many of my clients. I recommend a two-part approach to reducing chronic stress for good.
LIFESTYLE
The first step is to eliminate unnecessary stressors and for most of us that means lifestyle changes. It requires really taking ownership of your life and making intentional choices about how you work, where you live, what you eat, who you spend time with, clarifying your values, setting healthy limits and prioritizing self-care.
It is common to believe that we can’t do anything about most of the things we experience as stressful, but we generally have more options than we realize. It takes a willingness to step back and own responsibility for our experience, and the courage to make decisions to change what we can.
MANAGEMENT
Clearly there are chronic stressors in life that we can’t eliminate. We can’t change the age of our children, cure the terminal illness of a loved one or transform a family dynamic overnight. The second part of my approach is to increase skills for living with the chronic stressors that remain after employing lifestyle changes.
5 key elements of stress management are:
- Awareness. Increasing personal awareness is the foundation of stress management because you can only address what you’re aware of. The more in touch you are with your mental, emotional and physical states, the more adept you can be at responding earlier before your system is highly distressed. Increasing awareness requires that you SLOW DOWN.
- Self-soothing tools. Chronic stress overworks the sympathetic nervous system (our gas pedal). Activating the parasympathetic nervous system (our brakes) is key in countering the effects of chronic stress. This includes practicing relaxation techniques and activities such as meditation or yoga that are known to increase parasympathetic response. Breathing techniques are one of the simplest ways to engage our rest and relaxation system.
- Assertiveness skills. A common relational aspect of chronic stress is a difficulty in maintaining healthy boundaries with others. Learning to say no when appropriate and the ability to speak on your behalf are important aspects of assertiveness.
- Personal care plan. Addressing chronic stress requires making your self-care a priority and developing a lifestyle that supports it. Everyone is different and your personal care plan will be unique to you. Patience and practice may be needed to discover what works best and make it a sustainable part of your routine.
- Optimal nutrition. Nutrition plays an important role in stress resilience and repair ability. I recommend eliminating caffeine and adopting a low-glycemic, whole-food diet to keep blood sugars stable and avoid cortisol spikes. Nutritional supplements that support a healthy nervous system include high quality anti-oxidant vitamins, calcium, magnesium, and fish oil (Omega-3 essential fatty acids). Herbal supplements may also be considered for relaxation and adrenal support.
With intention, patience and practice you CAN change your stress from the kiss of death to the spice of life.