Have you ever heard the old saying “Don’t put all your eggs in one basket?” Its a gentle warning that there’s a risk in doing so. The literal risk is that if your basket breaks and falls, you’ll either have scrambled eggs or you’ll lose them altogether.
To me it means that there is a risk anytime we get all of our needs met through one avenue, be it a person, a thing, a job, or an activity.
There is a risk because we cannot guarantee that avenue will always be available to us, or that we will always be able to utilize it. If you only have one way to get a need met, what do you do then?
WHAT DO YOU DO when…..
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- the only way you manage your anxiety is running and you sprain your ankle?
- you get all of your self-worth through your job and you get laid off?
- there’s only one friend you talk to about your depression and you can’t reach her on a really bad day?
- alcohol is the only way you have to decompress but it causes fights with your spouse?
- your children are your whole purpose in life and now they’re on their own?
- food is the only way to soothe yourself when you’re upset but it’s causing you to gain weight?
- you count on your spouse/best friend to let off steam but they have their own crisis to deal with right now?
You get the idea.
The problem with having all of your eggs in one basket is that ITS NOT SUSTAINABLE.
Because LIFE HAPPENS; so it’s not a matter of if but when your “go to” thing will not be available. And it will leaving you feeling like you dropped your basket; messy and disappointing. Not a good place to be.
To avoid this, it’s important to develop a variety of ways to get our emotional needs met and tools do some of it for ourselves.
Multiple ways to manage anxiety means that one of them will always be available to you. Several avenues that feed your self-worth makes you less dependent on your job to feel good about yourself. A varied tool-kit for self-soothing means that you are more in control of how you feel regardless of the situation.
There is RELIEF AND FREEDOM in having choices and the ability to use the right tool at the right time. As you become less dependent and over-focused on one thing, you’ll experience greater ease within yourself and your relationships, and more self-confidence.
May you be happy, healthy and free, Pam